Her Voice Her Strength

Dear Kind Reader,

I hope you are well. Before we dive into today’s letter, I want to share something important with you. I’ve changed my website from Letters from Andreaa to Her Voice, Her Strength.

Why? Because as I continue on this journey, I realise that this is more than just letters this is my voice, and this is my strength. Every word I write, every experience I share, is a reflection of the resilience, faith, and determination that have carried me through. Her Voice, Her Strength isn’t just a name it’s a declaration of my journey and a space where I hope others can find courage and hope as well.

In addition to this new direction, I’ve also created a Support tab on the website. This tab provides an opportunity for anyone who feels moved to support this platform to donate. Your generosity helps to keep this space alive and allows me to continue sharing my story, offering hope, and creating a community of strength. If you feel compelled to contribute, it would mean the world to me.

With that, let’s continue my story… and take a moment to recap my previous blog.

In my last letter, I opened up about the emotional turmoil I faced not just from the diagnosis, but also from the words of those around me. I shared how comments like “It’s just a breast” and comparisons to Job in the Bible felt dismissive and painful during one of the hardest moments of my life.

I also spoke about my search for hope, from exploring natural herbal remedies to joining the NSPPD prayer platform. And then came my third hospital appointment in November 2022, where I was told I would need a mastectomy. The news was devastating, and when a pastor echoed the words “It’s just a breast”, I was left in shock, realising how little empathy I was receiving.

By the end of the blog, I touched on my hesitation to seek a second opinion until my manager encouraged me to sign up for private healthcare benefits at work, unknowingly opening the door to a new possibility.

A Life-Altering Decision: My Fight To Save My Breast

December 2022 arrived, and I was stuck. I was prepared to die rather than lose my left breast. I was angry not only because of someone’s negligence but also because I couldn’t understand why God was allowing this to happen to me.

Then, a friend at the time told me I couldn’t just do nothing. She allowed me to be in my feelings for a few days, but she emphasised that I needed to do something. “Look for another solution, just like you would for anything else,” she said. I told her they had said that the only option was to remove my breast, which was unacceptable, disheartening and as if all dignity was being taken away from me. She urged me again to search for other options.

So, I started Googling. I typed, “How to freeze a lump on the breast?” I also remembered a person, who I thought was a friend, telling me that she had frozen cancerous cells in her reproductive area. She had caught it early, and they froze it for her. Though we no longer speak, as I had realised she wasn’t a true friend, I was desperate at the time I messaged her, asking if she could share the hospital where the procedure was done.

She replied with the name of the hospital. I asked her to pray for this person. However,  she asked me if the person who wants undergo the procedure was a believer and she responded saying she would only pray for that person if they were a believer in Christ. I found this odd, disappointing and distasteful. No matter someone’s faith, I believe in praying for them. Little did she know, the person she was reluctant to pray for was actually me. I didn’t tell her that, though. I just needed the name of the hospital so I could reach out.

Exploring Cryoablation And My Search For Hope

As a Christian myself, I know I may not be painting believers in the best light in this moment, but I still believe that everyone is human. I encourage you not to be put off from following Christ based on the actions of others. It’s important to guard your heart and always strive to forgive and let go even though, as we all know, this isn’t always easy.

That said the hospital she referred me to was The Royal Marsden, a public and private hospital. I reached out to them, inquiring about the procedure to freeze the lump on my breast. The receptionist confirmed they had such a procedure and mentioned an appointment sometime at the end of November 2022. I was ready to pay for the consultation fee, as my private health insurance hadn’t kicked in yet it would activate in January 2023. Just before the appointment, the doctor cancelled and said they didn’t offer the procedure.

Back to Google I went. After more searching, I discovered a procedure called Cryoablation, which involves freezing the lump at a very high temperature. It was a clinical trial taking place in Turkey, Germany, and Israel. I found a Facebook group and asked a friend at the time to join, get the details, and help me get any doctor’s contact details. My heart just couldn’t handle joining another social media platform. I was overwhelmed, lacking the energy to take on more and avoiding it.

Finding Obstacles and Persistence in My Search

While she gathered information, I searched for hospitals in the UK offering Cryoablation. I found one called HCA, but after I explained the procedure I was seeking, they referred me to a doctor who cancelled after three days, saying they didn’t perform this procedure.

I then asked my cousin in Paris to look into hospitals in France. She connected me with the Institut Curie, a renowned French healthcare facility. I reached out to them and exchanged emails, uploading my scans to their system. Communication was frustrating as they spoke to me in French, and although I understood, I had to clarify I was an international patient and preferred to write in English. After many back-and-forths and even purchasing international phone cards to make calls, they eventually told me they didn’t offer Cryoablation either.

Someone else then recommended a hospital in Switzerland called CHUV Lausanne University Hospital. They also provided me with a link to a doctor there who performed Cryoablation, but when I called, they didn’t recognise the doctors name. After sending emails with my scans, they finally said they didn’t do Cryoablation either.

Meanwhile, I reached out to NSPPD, sending them a prayer request along with my scans. In my email, I said, “I don’t want to go through a mastectomy. May this not happen.” Did anyone from the church acknowledge my email? No. Despite my desperation, I continued reaching out, but I was met with silence or rejection.

Hope and Support Amidst Struggles

At this point, the friend who was helping me with the Facebook group found a doctor in Germany. I communicated back and forth with this doctor, and the doctor told me it was a clinical trial at Johann Wolfgang Goethe University in Frankfurt. He explained that I would need to undergo the procedure twice, and the total cost was 20k. I didn’t have that kind of money.

I felt uneasy asking others to fundraise, but I told some people the cost. Unfortunately, the energy I got it felt like no one seemed they were willing to help me raise that kind of money. So, I tried applying to take money from one of my pensions, but when I went to get it signed by my GP, the company Marigold declined my request. So, I was back to square one.

Taking Breaks, Gaining Perspective

I walked away from searching for other alternatives for a while. I felt sad, frustrated, and teary. I even didn’t log into work for a few days, though I eventually returned. During that time, I shared this diagnosis with a colleague and expressed how I didn’t want to undergo the mastectomy. Her response was similar to many others: “It’s just a breast. The reason for the surgery is to save your life.” She said But that wasn’t the point to me.

At my work Christmas party, which was two hours away from my home, I parked my car near my colleague’s home, as she suggested. Her partner dropped me off at the venue, and I acted normal. When the event ended, I returned to her home to collect my car. She casually mentioned “your cancer” in front of her partner. In my heart and mind, I rebuked it, saying, “This cancer doesn’t belong to me.” Why do people speak like that?

I hid my offense in my heart, suppressing how I felt about her comment. I did this a lot throughout my journey I never retaliated. Until one day… but we’ll talk about that another time. Anyway, she went on to talk about other things, like how she makes natural creams and herbs. We also spoke about her dog and as you know, so do I. Eventually, I left her home feeling exhausted and I nearly fell asleep at the wheel as I drove back home for 2 hours. 

Renewed Hope: Second Opinions and Advocacy

I continued praying on the NSPPD platform. Eventually, I joined a Bible study recommended by someone. The Bible study ran every Monday evening. I would join, listen, but rarely speak. One Monday, they prayed about cancer, and I couldn’t hold myself together anymore. I shared the diagnosis with the group, and they prayed for me. I was grateful, and I still appreciate this Bible study group, even though I rarely attend today in 2025.

After a break from searching for solutions, I got back at it again. I thought, “There must be someone in the UK who does this Cryoablation procedure.” I called HCA again in December 2022 An agent responded and said she didn’t know what I was asking for, but she would get a really nice breast cancer nurse to call me.

The breast cancer nurse called me that same day and explained, “I understand you have breast cancer, but Cryoablation isn’t a good procedure. We’ve had patients who’ve done it, and when they come to us, we find the cancer has spread or worsened.” She continued, “If you were my little sister, I’d want you to get the right treatment. Let me get one of our consultants to call you and see you for free.” She said this because HCA is a private hospital. – Looking back now, I honestly believe she was an angel sent to me. She is such a sweet person you’ll understand why I say that as we go further into my journey. I genuinely love her.

I agreed to see the consultant in January. By then, I knew I would have private health insurance through my work starting in January 2023. She said that was fine and arranged for the consultant to call me over the weekend that week in December I was shocked to be honest as it was a private hospital. Reflecting back this now the connection with the breast cancer nurse, felt like she was an angel sent by God at the perfect moment.

On the consultation call, I repeated my request for Cryoablation. The consultant told me, “We don’t do that here, but come in and see me. Let’s get your scans and files from your NHS hospital, and we will review if there’s another option.”

They said they would contact the NHS hospital for my records.

Advocacy: Taking Charge of Your Health

It’s important for those of us going through health struggles to seek multiple options and to advocate for ourselves. Sometimes the system, or even well-meaning people, may not provide the level of empathy or understanding we need. Don’t hesitate to push for what’s right for your body, your mental health, and your overall well-being.

Through this journey, I’ve learned a valuable lesson: it’s essential to advocate for yourself. You are your own best advocate. You have to ask questions, push for answers, and don’t stop until you get the care and support you need. When facing life-altering decisions, trust your instincts and stand firm in your choices, even if they’re difficult or unpopular.

“I also realise the power of hope never stop searching for it, no matter how many obstacles you face. I’m still on this journey, but I’ve learned that it’s okay to take breaks, to cry, and to ask for help if you can. I truly encourage you to reach out when you need support. I know that asking for help isn’t easy I’m one of those people who finds it difficult but despite that, I keep pushing forward to the best of my ability.”

To be continued…

Questions To Reflect On:

1. Have you ever found yourself stuck in a decision between conventional treatments and alternative options? How did you navigate that struggle?

2. How do you cope with the emotional weight of being dismissed by others during tough times? Have you experienced comments that felt dismissive or invalidating, and how did you handle them?

3. What role does faith play in your journey of healing or facing difficult challenges?

4. Have you ever had to challenge the system or seek second opinions to get the care you feel you deserve?

Thank you for reading.

Don’t forget to subscribe, like, and share this post. Also, check out my YouTube channel: Her Voice, Her Strength; https://youtube.com/@hervoiceherstrength

Warm wishes,

Andréa Xxx 💕